Wednesday, January 10, 2007

The World Has Turned and Left Me Here

Yesterday, I had to take my car in for service and they gave me a loaner car to use while it was in the shop. As I drove away from the mechanic's shop, I felt a disconcerting warm sensation under my rear. I thought maybe I had developed a urinary problem I didn't know about, so I actually stopped the car and checked my pants, only to realize that the car had built-in electric seat warmers.

I guess I've never had a car fancy enough to have a seat warming device, so this took me by surprise. Kids these days and their fancy new technology. Next thing you know, they'll let women vote.

In only marginally related news, a girl at work told me that she went on a date with a guy who attempted the "pretend to yawn and put your arm around her" maneuver at the movies. She asked me if this was actually still an acceptable way of trying to "get close" to your date.

I told her that I hadn't been on a date since the invention of the internal combustion engine, and that I was surprised that this procedure was still utilized. I figured that since the time that I was single, someone would have invented some kind of new and exciting hug sneaking technology that the kids would now be using. In fact, I told her that I admired this guy for kicking it old school and using a maneuver that I had thought was retired to the Lame Date Moves Hall of Fame.

I now have to go soak my teeth.