Monday, August 28, 2006

Packer Preseason Game Three: The Bengals

I'm tired and beleagured, so rather than do a full post about the Packer game tonight, I'll post a partial transcript of a chat I had during the game with a friend of mine, Lorenzo Lamas.

York: Good God
Lamas: The only thing that could be worse is if Favre's DNA matches Jon Benet Ramsey...

York: Ahmad Carroll defending...
York: Palmer could be playing in a wheelchair, as long as he keeps throwing to Carroll's guy.
Lamas: At least Carroll didn't kick him in the groin.
York: Carroll is never close enough to anyone to kick them in the groin. He'd need 20 foot legs.

York: If they wouldn't have beaten the Seahawks 2nd team in the last game of the year, they'd have Reggie Bush right now.
York: Suzy Kolber makes me want to stab my eyes.

York: Enough love for Carson Palmer. He's not playing Hezbollah, for God's sake.

York: Is there a video of a human birth or something on that I would be more comfortable watching?

Lamas: Favre's looking for a loophole in his "I'm coming back" statement.
Lamas: "Uh... I meant coming back to pick up my stuff."

York: Theismann: Mike McCarthy has to be "concerned a little bit."
York: Much like David Koresh might be a little concerned about what that burning smell might be.

York: Samkon with the catch!
Lamas: Gado has worse hands than a high school sophomore at his first prom.
York: Where he’s from, the only thing you can catch is malaria.
Lamas: chuckle

York: I see the season starts on the 5th anniversary of 9/11. I'm sure that will be done tastefully.
Lamas: "It'll bring the house down"
York: “ARE YOU READY FOR AL-QAEDA!”

York: Theismann: “Favre and Rodgers are totally different quarterbacks.” As in: Favre is the only three time MVP in league history, and Rodgers has a mustache.

Lamas: Rodgers had to be the only QB who has ever been cut from Packer fantasy camp.

York: Tirico just pointed out that Cory (who is black) and Aaron Rodgers (who is white) are unrelated. Actually, I think that’s wrong – I think they’re married.
York: They saw the constitutional amendment coming and eloped.
Lamas: Aaron Rodgers left the Packers today, citing the team's lack of domestic partner benefits. Esera Tuaolo was unavailable for comment.