Tuesday, July 04, 2006

The Terrorist Next Door

This is for those of you that actually think the internet makes people smarter.

Amid Jessica McBride's excellent reporting on the Kevin Barrett story, one thing specifically jumped out at me. As you know, Barrett is the delirious UW-Madison professor who believes that Dick Cheney planned the 9-11 attacks in order to give the U.S. an excuse to start a holy war.

In Part Three of her radio interview with Barrett, he implies that the U.S. was actually working with Osama bin Laden on the plot. In making his case, he says that bin Laden at one point actually toured U.S. military facilities under a false name. And the name that the U.S. Government supposedly gave one of the world's most dangerous killers?

Tim Osman.

Tim Osman! The world's most dangerous man, and they call him "Tim?"

I can see the discussion at one of the bases now:

"Hey, who's the new guy with the beard taking notes?"

"Oh, that's just Tim from the temp agency. He's here to help fix the computers."

"What's with the seven foot tall walking cane?"

"That's IT people for you. They're kind of weird. You should check out his MySpace page, though. Seems pretty popular."

I looked it up, and it's true - there are crackpot conspiracy theorists pitching the theory that the U.S Government was working with Tim Osman on military operations as far back as 1986. Search Google for "Tim Osman," and you come up with stuff like this account of a military meeting in Los Angeles:

The meeting, Gunderson confirmed, took place at the Hilton Hotel on Ventura Blvd. Sherman Oaks, Calif., with four men present.

They included Gunderson, who was accompanied by scientist Michael Riconosciuto, then a long-time weapons and explosives expert linked to the CIA. Two representatives of the Afghan rebels were also present: Ralph Olberg, described as a “prominent American businessman” who worked at the Afghan desk at the State Department, and a man using the CIA-provided cover name of Tim Osman, who, according to Grabbe, was bin Laden without his beard.
Actually, the CIA has released a photo of what bin Laden actually looks like without his beard. No word on whether the agents took Osman by Mann's Chinese Theater to see Pee Wee Herman's star on the walk of fame.

And this one, which is my favorite:

Tim Osman, identified by Grabbe as bin Laden, was dressed in sports clothes and, like Gunderson, did not say much, leaving most of the discussion to Riconosciuto and Olberg.
Sports clothes? Was he wearing a George Brett jersey?

Incidentally, every time I order a pizza from now on, it will be under the name "Tim Osman."

Note: Tim Osman is in no way related to Donny Osmond, who has been slowly destroying America in more secretive and insidious ways for 30 years.

Double note: In more important news, here's a picture of a fat naked guy with a mustache playing the bongos. Diamonds.